Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Week 30

Seven months now.
Coming into the thick of the last trimester
Right around the time I start to fully realize that we are in fact just within weeks of meeting this new, tiny mystery being. Suddenly, the whole pregnancy feels a little more "real" and that loose vision of another baby in our home, begins to sweetly take shape.

Funny, because you would think that with this being my fifth pregnancy, it would all be so obvious by now. The sense of awe dwindling each time, due to preset experience, but that is never really the case it seems. For me, every pregnancy has come with a certain surreal sense of disbelief.
For me, it feels a little bit like magic every single time.

"So, who got you pregnant?"
Leon will ask in varying ways randomly, usually first thing in the morning (A question that started early on and typically comes at me in one form or another, just as I am waking. Still blurry eyed and understandably dull on my responses to such complex inquires) I tried the romanticized (if not generic) version that included God and a metaphor that played on "seeds" but he wouldn't stop.
 Last week I rolled over, desperate to secure the better part of one more hour in bed, and answered "Your dad."

That extra hour, shot.
I may have used the promise of gf pancakes to shift the conversation.

"The baby is naked in your tummy?" 
"Yep. The babies come out naked"
"No cape?"
"No rex, no cape." 
.... Silent, but noticeable disappointment setting in...

Arlo, luckily, seems to grasp the general idea of pregnancy. He's eight, going on eighteen, so there is very little to explain. Thank God. Originally, I thought if I showed them those incredible videos of babies in utero it would somehow ease some of their growing intrigue in the matter, but Leon, it seems, is dead set on forcing me to contemplate real explanations involving the basics behind human reproduction. Where before it was all so easy. There was one baby, then another, then one right after that. Basically they were all infants together so no one was questioning where anyone else came from. The extent of their biggest concerns being: who was getting the next squeezable yogurt, and, who's turn it was to hold the bubble gun.

As far as vanity issues are concerned, the seventh month also happens to mark that growing, frightful concern about just how far your body has come and just how far away you will be from where it started, once the nine month journey is over. Vain, I know. But literally it's always around the 7th month that it really starts to get me. Where I start to seriously wonder how this body can ever, possibly "go back" Or, how in world I ever wore certain jeans! My last - biggest go-to tee- shirts suddenly proving obscenely small. And then there's that telling third trimester waddle that starts to come into effect right when you've about outgrown every semi fashionable item in your closet, other than those big convenient "house dresses" your husband is utterly confused by every time you start to slip one on. "Is that a nightgown?" He will ask, genuinely worried that you are leaving the house in a big, for- bed, floral body tent.

So it goes.
If this one happens the same as the others - a couple weeks early - I have only about eight weeks left to prepare. A room, some clothing, all of the necessities, and of course that whole car issue looming over us still.

Other than that, I'll be tryin to soak up and enjoy as much of it as I possibly can.
Eating doughnuts, taking mid afternoon naps, waddleing around in my favorite house dress while dodging questions about sex coming at me bedside from my sweet but terribly insistent five-year old.

Another eight weeks.
And then life is about to get really interesting.

In other news, I wanted to thank every single one of you who contributed to the last post. I was utterly shocked to see just how many people were hanging on to the very same frustrations as far as superficial blogging content and overwhelming use of consumer pushing is concerned. Makes me sure that the state of where these blogs are lingering now is not where a big portion of us readers care to follow. It also provided me with so many ideas about where this new blog should focus it's attention as far as the personal posts go. Real women who feel they are not represented for one reason or another, be it due to income, single status, working full time, or in the midst of raising older children with separate issues on their plate that aren't making much news on the regular mommy blog's agenda these days. All stories we plan on including in this next journey. As well as so much more. Thank you, thank you!

And lastly, a few of our most recent family photos are over at The Stork and The Beanstalk today, along with a short interview in which I share some other thoughts on pregnancy, sleep training and the promise of a summer margartia just around the corner.

We had so much fun spending the day with Ashley. Not only are her photos gorgeous and incredibly true to the personalities she's shooting, but she also makes it an easy, personable experience so that it feels so much like having a friend in your home with a camera, rather than a stranger there to secure a certain image. In other words, no pressure involved. I mean, even Mike had fun! I love them all because she managed to capture the true essence of our family, and our household as it is. Thank you Ashley. You're the best.


  1. Jess, I just read the interview and loved it. The photography is so beautiful as well. I love the expressions on your face in particular.

    And you know, I never experienced the questions about pregnancy from my boys either, as they were pretty much babies when their brothers were born. I never even thought about how that would be! So hilarious. Thank you for showing your genuine self with us. It is truly beautiful and I wish we lived closer. You really seem to have your head screwed on straight, ha!

    1. yes, we are so in the same boat. Three boys back to back.

      Feels slightly strange to have this break in between....

      And if we lived closer, we'd be hanging on a weekly basis, I'm sure.

  2. those photos are gorgeous! i just love the questions kids ask, so curious yet so innocent! as far as the whole superficial blogging thing, i also agree and have thought about it when i come across such blogs. as an only parent of two little girls, i don't think i can say i have come across a "mommy" blog i can relate to very much. as a mother, yes (yours, duh! thanks for keeping it real!) but as a single/only parent, no. seems like many are too busy trying to portray a perfect lifestyle when they're posting content that may not always reflect the reality of it all. nothing wrong with being "perfect", but I think many appreciate/seek blogs they can relate to when times aren't peachy. I look forward to your new project!

    1. thanks!

      I am really wanting to share the voices and stories of single moms because I just never see it displayed or written about anywhere, and it's a shame to feel like just because you aren't married you can't relate to what's out there.

      thank you for writing. I'm very much looking forward to sharing the new space with women just like you.

  3. Jessica, You look AMAZING!! It is pretty magical growing a tiny being in your belly! I'm 36 weeks pregnant with only 4 weeks to prepare! Yikes! Lots to do, little energy! :)
    We watched the movie 'Babies' to help Aniston understand the whole concept of a new baby that's about to arrive. It was definitely interesting and lots more questions that I wasn't ready for also. From the mouths of our babes. Haha!! Enjoy the next 8 weeks as a family of 5! xoxo

    1. HI jen!!

      36 weeks?! You're so close! I'm so excited for you. And thank you for the complements. I feel like a big ol' house so I'll take what I can get :)

      Also, so funny about questions regarding how new babies get here, huh? I think now that you mention it, I'm going to show the boys that documentary too. It's on netflix I think, right?

      Well, hope you rest up and let's plan on a playdate at some point soon?

  4. Beautiful photos!! You look gorgeous and I love how specious and open is your house. I can't believe you are already 30 weeks pregnant....How did that happen? :) I can't wait to meet your new addition to the family!

    1. I know! I feel like it went by pretty fast too. And thank you for your well wishes.
      You are so sweet.

  5. Hi, I recently discovered your blog - good writing, well rounded - down to earth, intelligent, thoughtful and thought provoking. I can't wait to tell my daughter (30 - pregnant too with 2nd) about you -I think she will really appreciate your take on things. I commented in the last post and I'm afraid I was rather blunt, sorry, ....but I think you are on to something many young women are talking about - I know my daughter and daughter-in-law have talked in depth about these issues and their wanting to see more authentic (as opposed to curated) mom/women bloggers. I wish you the best!

    1. wow, so good to hear from you! and hey, blunt is totally fine. In fact, I almost never comment even in blogs I really love so anyone who took time out to say anything, is much appreciated.

      Also, so happy to hear you think your kin will appreciate this kind of new blog forum. I hope you do too, actually! I'm really hoping to expand the scope of content we offer so that it appeals, on some level anyway, to all ages. Not just market targets :)

      Anyway, thanks so for stopping in. I look forward to hearing from you, and your daughters (in law) down the line.

  6. First - Hi.

    Just found your blog, and had a little read. I always have to go through some pages, before I decide if I actually like a blog, and want to visit again. I will here.

    I love your style, like the jacket you are wearing in the 25 week post, also the bananbread looked REALLY good, the woven Baskets you hang on the wall is just LOVE and your thoughts on mommy blogs these days I agree with completely.

    Anyway, just wanted to leave a word, wish you luck with the new baby, and now I will keep reading more here.
    Lot's of love.

    1. hi,
      nice to have you.

      thanks so much. the sweater is vintage from etsy and it's the coziest one I have. Too bad It's not cool enough though to wear it much :/


  7. Hi, I'm a new follower since your last post (nailed it, btw.) Have you seen the series of motherhood stories in the NYT Motherlode blog? She's intentionally featuring mothers from all walks of life and social classes and allowing them to describe their day to day struggles. It's really interesting, and somewhat heartbreaking, to read the comments from readers. Here's one - http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/02/24/parenting-when-even-minimum-wage-is-out-of-reach/?_php=true&_type=blogs&module=BlogPost-Title&version=Blog%20Main&contentCollection=Style&action=Click&pgtype=Blogs&region=Body&_r=0

    36 weeks with #2 here, feeling like a whale and contemplating whether or not I should go shovel the 3 inches of snow that fell again last night. My pubic bone might nicer forgive me.

  8. I love every bit of this. From your boys' sweet questions to your thoughts on pregnancy. And that photo shoot? I loved having that little peek into your family and it seems so authentic and wonderful. The photo of you comforting a crying Rex was one of my favorites :)

  9. Ha, I love the idea of the baby coming out wearing a cape! Also, I'm excited to see the new space - this is one of my favorite blogs, so I'm sure that your new project will also be amazing. And loved the interview over at The Stork & The Beanstalk. Best, Melissa

  10. I sometimes cannot get over how gorgeous you are. Pregnant or not, but especially now. You are radiant!

    ... also, I still want to be adopted by your family. Or at least be your neighbors.


    1. oh geeze, I certainly don't feel that way, but I do think Ashley's lens and angles are kind :)
      Also, come on! You were the cutest pregnant girl I have EVER seen. Literally.

      I can't even imagine the joy in my life if we were neighbors, Lauren. I feel like that kind of luck just does not exist.
      You would be my ideal. Our honkey tonk bbq's would never stop

      And, we will totally adopt you, as long as Sally comes too.


  11. I loved the photos and interview! You are an amazing mama!

    I am also jealous that you live in such an awesome neighborhood. We live in so cal. but most of our neighbors are original owners and are retirement age. No kids on our street!

    1. Hi Kayla,

      The neighborhood definitely makes a difference. I always say that the city we live in is not maybe our ideal, but the benefits that come with having such close and caring suburban neighbors sure counts for a lot. There are kids out constantly, and everybody on this street looks out for each other's children, so it's a relief to give them a sense of free range around the street, with the security of so many eyes and ears on them at all times. I grew up in a similar way, so I am happy they get to experience a small sense of community like we have here.

  12. Be careful how you navigate that whole baby-being-born issue... In elementary school, we were asked to make a picture book of our life to display on the walls for parents night. I remember my mom being completely mortified when she walked up to my book that had - on the cover no less - me coming out from between her legs. Uh-huh, true story. That photo album she had of my birth in the birth center quickly disappeared after that. Curious eyes wander and curious minds ask. Good luck with that ;)

    In other news, thank you for your kind words. You're too sweet. And, as I've said a thousand times, you made it super easy. That first pic you posted is one of my favorites of you. So natural, so beautiful.